Friday, June 29, 2007
I just received an inspiration from God on how to brighten up my OB presentation. It may be corny, it may be lame, but damn be me if I don't use it.
So anyway guys, I'm gonna talk about something very personal about my behaviour, something that i don't really talk about. My ultimate fear, the one fear i totally forgot about to write in the friendship test, the one that should have been my choice of my ultimate disliked feeling.
My fear of rejection (or fear of feeling rejected, either's fine).
I once liked someone (hell, i'm not even sure if the liking stopped), but did nothing about it. I swear she was like one of the most cheerful people i'd ever meet and man was she just as sweet. I could have said something but the fear held me back. Nothing might have resulted if i had told her, then again everything could have happened if i did.
Another person, same idea. I liked her, i told her in a roundabout way, not before making her swear not to be any different to me once i told her. She kept her promise.
In both past experiences, i let fear hold me back. I let fear lead me to a detour and avoid the possibility of knowing what the response might be. It was a 50-50 chance but i let the 50% chance of rejection seem bigger than what it really was.
And that my friends, is why I'll never be attached (among the assortment of reasons ranging from "he's an insensitive bastard" to "he's weird").
P.s. Sorry if my post seem haphazard and all, writing about my behaviour and past experiences screws up my writing technique, the right words just dont come.
Thanks to all the blogs i referred to (countless) for html code help :) (esp. cyn' and sixseven)
Adobe Photoshop Elements for supernatural abilities
